Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Facing My Fears


This seemingly innocuous piece of plastic has been the source of many unwarranted fears until I made the discovery to the depth of its meaning.
Every month I would punch out my pills and put them in a bottle for easier access. When I was done with the card all that was left were empty holes and tabs. For some reason it made me sick to my stomach to look at the empty card. I would push the card back in the package and keep it for the refill number.
Now I haven't been using this medicine for over a month. So when I went to look to see if there were any pills left I freaked out. It hit me with a visual of my skin when I was 5 years old. It would itch so terribly that I would scratch my legs till they bled. My parents would put socks on my hands or slap my hands to stop me from scratching, but it just kept itching. So this little empty card looked like my shredded legs in the afternoon when I was 5. Now that I made this discovery I think I can look at more things I have been avoiding in my life.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

The Vision of A Wolf

This morning while I was in a haze still trying to wake up; I saw a vision of a brown wolf. He looked directly at me. I asked him "What are you doing?" He bowed slightly and replied "Just got back from the hunt"
I said "wow You have hunted at the crack of dawn. And killed a little later. Then you fed your family all before I even woke up?"
"Yes" he said
"I can't do that." I said to him, sadly
"Do what you can do" he replied. Then he made an about face. I watched his tail swish gently as he casualy walked back into the woods.